In a baffling turn of events that could only happen in a town where the biggest scandal was once a squirrel stealing a gardener's prize tomatoes, the local bakery, Doroth Bakery, became the scene of a crime so absurdly sweet, it could make a donut cry. Early Wednesday morning, as the sun peeked over West Grove, a daring pastry pilferer made off with not just a few loaves of bread, but an entire tray of fresh croissants. Witnesses reported seeing a suspicious figure, described as ‘a blur of flour and frosting,’ making a hasty exit just as the aroma of baked goods was wafting through the air. "I thought I was dreaming!" exclaimed Abigail Wilson, 54, a resident known for her tendency to worry over the smallest things. "One minute I was munching on my morning scone, and the next, my croissant-loving heart was shattered! Who steals croissants? It’s like stealing happiness!" Local authorities are currently investigating the pastry poaching but have noted that leads are as flaky as the buttery goodness that was stolen. Officer Tim Crumble, renowned for his no-nonsense approach to crime (and his love for a good muffin), stated, “This is a serious matter. We will not rest until justice is served — preferably with a side of jam.” As the investigation unfolds, residents have taken to social media to express their outrage and, oddly enough, to post croissant memes. One local group even dubbed themselves the ‘Croissant Avengers,’ vowing to protect their baked goods at all costs. Meanwhile, at Doroth Bakery, owner Margie Baker (no joke, that’s her name!) is heartbroken. “I’ve been here for 20 years, and this is the first time I’ve ever had a croissant heist! What’s next? A cupcake caper?” As we await further updates, one thing is clear: this town isn’t just about the population of 6,222; it’s about the community coming together to protect their pastries. So if you see a suspicious character with flour on their hands, you might just want to keep an eye on them. After all, croissants are a serious business! Stay tuned for updates on the case, and remember folks: If you see something, say something... especially if it’s croissants!